Monday, August 30, 2010
Bassetts vs. Weeks
This past weekend the parents met. My father has never met Andrews parents before. When we got married my parents couldnt afford to come so after 9 years this baptism ended up giving us something more to worry about than if you could see his underwear through the wet white jumpsuite. Andrews parents were very unfriendly and rude to me when Andrew and I were first dating. They were upset that we were not getting married in the temple but choose to not really see how he contributed to that out come and take it all out on me. Once I realized that we were going to marry I wrote a short letter saying lets put the past behind us and they wrote back explaining their concerns for the kind of mother I would be. My dad was so so so so offended. He loves me and was very hurt that I was not being accepted by them. In all honesty I was just ready to call off the baptism all together cause I was so worried about how having these people in the same room would go. My dad is the kind of guy that simply wants to "step outside" to settle a dispute and thats not condusive to the spirit. But the show must go on so I simply went ahead with the plans and bought ulcer meds. Its over with now. It went well... I guess... because there were no fist fight or screaming and yelling. But my dad and his dad avoided the hell out of each other and there was a giant elephant in the room if you will. AWKWARD! Being a parent I get where my dad is coming from. How would you feel if some one decided your daughter was unworthy of their son? There was a point where I was outside with my dad not sure if he was going to come stand in the circle for the confirmation. I just listened and let him vent and then when he was done I said "are you ready to do this?" and he just walked back in the room and got in the circle. It was stressful and frustrating. And I can honestly say I do not want to do it again. I am not bitter or angry with any one. I just look at the situation and think about how I can do things differently with my kids. As much as we try and hide things from our kids they pick up on things. Dallin some how became aware of the fact that Andrew's parents didn't like me and my dad doesn't like them. Thats really sad. I know I don't want these events to be stressfull for him when he has kids. So I hope I can take it all in and not make the same mistakes.